Text Days

by Patty Lawrence

I like texting. Low expectations for sentences, eloquence, and grammar. Somehow that evolved into capturing textish-short glimpses of the day. Below is a sampling of nearly a year long collection.

Fieldtrips: Today Avery’s class visited a landfill and was instructed to bring a lunch with nothing disposable. Jordan’s class visited a Cincinnati park and was told to throw away everything.

Joined Costco for glasses deal then felt compelled to shop. Now have 553 oz of cheese, 297 lbs of cereal, and enough tissues squirreled away to last well into 2013. Even their carts are oversized.

Malbec mood. Too bad I didn’t choose well.

Dazed and confused with time change. Set the clock back one hour but trouble was that it had already set itself back one hour. While this morning’s schedule was way off, everyone was in a good mood for the extra hours sleep.

Good to run today. Could have easily done it after this hair cut. Who would know the difference?

The D is sticking on my keyboard. B has never been that great. So good becomes goo and did/I , and/an, draft/raft. Wind/win. The jumble mess of my typing. Dear Hope you had a good day. Is now Ear, Hope you ha a goo ay. Not counting on spell check.

Overheard at a funeral: The sun came out. See, Mommy is in heaven.

Glasses. Clarity regained. Can’t believe what I’ve been missing.

The “to do” list running in my head is a bad way to go.

Girls had sitter, asleep now. All I know is that they enjoyed vast amounts of perfume. I’ll be enjoying it for the next week.

Checking said “to do” list would be helpful.

So one little accidental and unknown button push and Garmin is asking me if I want to go to Kabul. Next button push and I can get to Cincinnati if I can read Arabic. Third attempt with wayward buttons and menu went missing.

The Tooth Fairy forgot last night. Daughter flashed a wicked grin and then gave me the note lobbying for $5 because this might be her last tooth.

Email ADD.

No longer care about the quality of the Malbec.

Girls and Uncle Steve built a huge snowman. Took both Steve and Andy to lift the middle ball. The pine cone belt the girls gave him made him the only x- rated snowman in all of Upper Arlington. Boys quickly added more pinecones as the solitary one just wouldn’t do. From indoors we laughed so hard we almost cried.

I told my youngestshe is precocious. She replied, “If you think I’m precocious, you should see Claire.”

Whippy Dip is open. Forget the robins. This is the true harbinger of spring. It did not matter that it was 50 degrees and pouring rain, the crowd stood outside under their umbrellas and gladly waited their turn at the ice cream counter. From our car, passing by, we cheered.

My computer battery says that it’s operating at 40%, plugged in, not charging. I thought it meant me.

It’s winter here again… gray and dreary, but for the daffodils which stand firmly against the snow. The plants that were popping out of the ground seem to be holding their breath for nicer days ahead.

So the lock between the laundry room has been on the fritz and finally stopped worked in the locked position. It is safe to assume that I’ll not have a career at breaking and exiting in the foreseeable future.

Bin Laden is dead. Ten years. Unbelievable. Finally. My girls don’t know who he is or about 9/11. Define their lives before they knew it.

Going to the Christian Life Store in search for a gift that is not overly religious is a waste of time.

The ice cream truck came by blaring “La Cucaracha.” The truck is driven by a frizzy-haired, grumpy women whose eyes don’t focus in the same direction. Guess corporate loosened its grip.

Worm orgies. All over town, thousands of worms came out of the ground and then died. The official explanation? Worm orgies.

Overheard in DC: “Hey Mom, is this where we saw the rat?”

Eldest daughter had had two messages on the machine. I had one. Tipped.